A Celebration of Birth

As a way of commemorating the birth of my first son, I shared my birth story publicly on this blog on his first birthday. Birth is something that is not often talked about in polite conversation, and as a newly expecting mother 4 years ago, I had very few friends with kids to talk to (or at least that I felt comfortable talking to about labor and childbirth). I would like to keep that tradition going on the first birthday of my second son so that any expecting mother who comes across this blog will know that not all births are created equal. 

But it is the unexpected things you can't plan for that make childbirth amazing. 

Here is my story...

If each pregnancy is a fruit, my first was an apple and my second was an orange.

My first pregnancy was sweet and enticing. Everything was easy. I went day to day blissfully aware of this miracle of life growing inside of me, but I was able to carry on with my regular activities. I was in the gym four or five times a week for the majority of my pregnancy, deadlifting 185 pounds for repetitions just days before my little one’s arrival. I had no issues with sleep or food. I kept up with my chores at home. I worked up until my due date and he was born two days later without complications.

My second pregnancy was bittersweet. Early on, I had bleeding that could not be attributed to any activity or complications. I lost all interest in food and became overly lethargic to the point of taking time off from work and missing activities with friends and family. In the latter half of the pregnancy, doctors discovered an Echogenic intracardiac focus (EIF) during an ultrasound, a small bright spot on the baby's heart. The EIF is thought to represent mineralization, or small deposits of calcium, in the muscle of the heart. While they can be found in roughly three to five percent of normal pregnancies, they are considered a soft indicator of Down ’s syndrome. Insert worry and anxiety.

As I frantically researched what kind of care is needed for newborns with Down’s syndrome and what kind of special care our baby would need later in life, a genetic test was performed to determine likelihood that our baby would be born with a chromosomal abnormality. For several weeks, we waited and wondered. I had convinced myself that God chose us to love this baby because he knew we were capable and had the capacity to love a baby with special needs. When the results came in, they were one in 10,000 that our baby would be born with Down’s syndrome. While my anxiety ceased, I was then upset with technology for causing me all that anxiety when we would have loved the baby regardless of how many chromosomes he was born with. I wasted weeks of my pregnancy worrying. More than that, I was upset with myself for allowing myself to get so carried away.

More inexplicable bleeding had me sitting out physical activity for the last three months of my pregnancy. I did yoga on my own at home to not go crazy! My body was telling me something was wrong. Into the third trimester, food became unappetizing again and more lethargy set in. I did not feel myself at all. I longed for the days of my first pregnancy and the worry returned. What if the difficulties I was facing in my pregnancy were an indication of how difficult this second baby would be? Still, he was growing and we were both healthy. I focused on these details to carry me through the last several weeks of my pregnancy when I gave notice at work and went one week and three days overdue.

Being overdue, we had one false alarm where we headed to the hospital prematurely. How does that happen in your second pregnancy? I was so sure I must have been having contractions. They were five minutes apart. Nevertheless, when we got to the hospital… nothing. Disappointed but knowing it was not going to happen that night, we headed home and waited some more. That Tuesday we had an appointment with the midwife. Still no contractions, so she performed a membrane sweep with hopes I would go into labor on my own.

The following morning I sent Sam to work. I woke up feeling as though it would be a day just like any other. We were set for a gentle induction the next morning and there were no indications the baby had any other plans. I spent the day like many before it: eating spicy foods and hanging around the house. I decided to tackle some crafts for an upcoming baby shower when I set in with a terrible stomachache. There was nothing rhythmic or consistent about it, just a constant, dull rumbling and aching in my abdomen. This started around 4 in the afternoon. When Sam and Silas got home from work and daycare, respectively, I decided I was going to take a warm bath to soothe my tummy. In the tub, the pain instantly subsided. Then it returned within minutes only to go away after roughly a minute. That’s weird, I thought. I continued to relax. Three minutes later, the pain returned, so I grabbed my phone to begin tracking what had to be contractions. Twenty minutes later, I had a very clear pattern and called for my husband to load the bags into the car. For sure, this was it.

We left for the hospital around 6 pm. Laurie, our doula and friend, was waiting for us when we arrived at the hospital. When we checked in, the contractions were consistently one to two minutes apart. I was disappointed to hear my cervical check revealed I was only 4 cm dilated. How was that even possible when my contractions had become so intense and so close together? I asked the nurses to fill the whirlpool tub so I could continue to relax. While the tub filled, I circled the halls of the maternity ward with Laurie and Sam, stopping as necessary to breathe through the pain of the frequent contractions.

After three or four laps, we stopped back in the room to check in with the nurses and to see if the tub was filled. At this point, the contractions were becoming unbearable. They were much more intense than my first labor, which began at four minutes apart and presented as intense menstrual cramps. These contractions took my breath away. My breathing had become audible during each one. The nurse noticed that I was having difficulty coping and suggested I might be in transition. As the tub was still filling, she suggested getting the doctor on call to perform another check. When the doctor entered the room, I asked if it was too late for the drugs. I hadn’t used our code word, so she laughed and said I didn’t need them and I was doing just fine. My next words were something along the lines of, “It’s too late, anyway. He’s here.” My body was telling me it was time to push. Sure enough, she performed her check and gave me permission to push away.

It didn’t take long before I was screaming (unapologetically this time) and grunting my way through the baby crowning. It had to have been less than ten minutes when the nurses told me to open my eyes. I looked down and saw what looked like a glistening head protruding from my body. I closed my eyes and bore down one final time and he was here.

I remember crying as my husband placed him on my chest and I kissed him all over while the nurses threw towels on us to keep us warm. At this point, my body was shaking uncontrollably and the doctor decided to administer Pitocin to prevent any bleeding (did I forget to mention my blood platelets were inexplicably low this pregnancy, too?). While the contractions had been more intense in this pregnancy, the pushing and delivery seemed to be quicker and mildly less uncomfortable. In any case, all that was forgotten as I held my beautiful boy in my arms. He was here. He was healthy. He was breathing fine. He had ten fingers and ten toes. He was more beautiful than I could have imagined.

Our family was now a family of four.

What I learned shortly thereafter was that Judah Samuel was born in the caul, a phenomenon that occurs in about 1 in every 80,000 births. My husband told me the baby was slippery and shiny. Sam couldn’t feel the amniotic sac encasing the baby as he reached to catch him, but when Judah’s shoulders emerged from my body, the sac burst and my husband’s arms were covered in fluid. The doctor said it was her first in caul delivery. The nurses exclaimed how amazing it was to witness. Babies born in the caul are said to have lifelong good luck and are thought to be excellent swimmers. Throughout history, cauls were prized by sailors and were thought to protect them from drowning at sea; So much so, that sailors would pay large sums of money for talismans made with a caul to protect them.

Even later, we found out that I had a circumvallate placenta. Another rare condition, circumvallate placentas occur in roughly one percent of all pregnancies. There is no known cause or any risk factors associated with the condition, a variation in the normal shape of the placenta in which the chorionic plate on the fetal side is too small. The doula who encapsulated my placenta pointed out the condition to us when she delivered my capsules. She showed us a picture of the placenta pre-preparation noting the tell-tale ring around the placenta where the fetal membranes had “doubled back.” The condition can result in a decreased supply of nutrients to the fetus, or can cause miscarriage, pre-term birth, or placental abruption in more extreme cases. Thank the good Lord for sending me signs that I needed to take it easy and care for my baby and my body before anything else.

With all the unusual circumstances surrounding my pregnancy and delivery, I fully believe that Judah is a miracle baby and worthy of his name (Judah is a Hebrew name meaning Praise and Samuel meaning “God has heard”; ergo, God has heard our praise). Judah is the answer to prayer. His conception was prayed for. My pregnancy with him was prayed over by many. And his birth and life, in my estimation, is a miracle. You can tell me otherwise, but I will forever be grateful for this sweet gift from God.

As for his temperament outside of the womb? He is the most calm and contented baby I have had the pleasure of knowing. He was worth the anxiety, worth the caution and worth the wait.

Photo by Starrella Photography

1 Samuel 1:27 I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him.